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Sunday, June 11, 2017

Being In The Beatitudes: Modeling Meekness


As a Papa to two sons, as I approach the verse 5:5, "Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth," I began to ponder: How does one best model meekness for them? It's certainly not something we see in our culture very often. More often, boys look up to athletes who arrogantly brag and boast. We certainly cannot imagine them in terms of "meekness." In fact, I would dare to say that if men and boys were polled they would defined meekness as weakness. They would see meekness as timid, fragile, and wimpy. Is that what Christ is referring to when he said the meek would inherit the earth? Is he referencing those who are spineless, frail and are push-overs?

Was Jesus really saying, "Blessed are the weaklings and cowards, for they shall inherit the earth"?

The Hebrew word for meek is anav and means: poor, afflicted, humble.
The Greek word is praus and means: mild, gentle

Most of us would hear words like "poor and afflicted" with disdain and are definitely not quick to embrace them. How many of us want to model that for our kids?

Meekness is not a lack of confidence. It is not being a doormat. It is not being indecisive.


In my own life, I grew up with a strong example of meekness in my grandfather, who I called "Papa Fred." He was a quiet and humble man, who was strong of character. At his funeral, everyone spoke of him being a "true gentleman" and it that he never said an unkind word about anyone. I cannot recall a single time he ever raised his voice and yet I saw him as strong, as someone to emulate and want to be like. When I first read the novel To Kill a Mockingbird, I could not help but see the character of Atticus Finch in terms of my grandfather. There was that quiet strength that both men have. They do not brag or complain, but live their lives in a manner that reflects their dignity and the dignity of others. They do not see the need to put others down to make themselves look better. Atticus tells his son Jem, "I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what." My grandfather, like Atticus, understood that one made the choice to do the right thing, even when it wasn't the easy thing to do, and that the majority is not one's conscience and should never be. He was the one who taught me that a closed mind showed open ignorance. His strength was a deep, inner strength.  He may not have been what the world deems successful, but to me, he was what I wanted most to become. I saw how a man who was far from wealthy, still did what he could to help others, including taking in family members in need to live in the small, two-bedroom house he and my grandmother lived in. 


One of the strongest examples in our modern culture of meekness is Fred Rogers. Like my grandfather, Mister Rogers was a mild, quiet man who treated others with dignity and respect. As a child, I loved watching his television show on PBS. His voice and demeanor was always calm and gentle. He spoke directly to the camera, to us, and made us feel we mattered, that we were important, and that we really was his neighbor. I saw in him a living example of someone who took Christ's words that all were our neighbors literally. He brought viewers into his community. "Mutual caring relationships," he once said, "requires kindness and patience, tolerance, optimism, joy in the other's achievements, confidence in oneself, and the ability to give without undue thought of gain." When I read those words, I thought, "He just encapsulated the Beatitudes." And everyone who knew Fred Rogers would vouch that the man lived his life just as he presented on television. There was no on-screen Fred Rogers and a different one off-camera. Even when he accepted his lifetime achievement award, he used the opportunity to make those in the audience feel good about themselves, he made this award not about himself, but about others and kindness. "We live in a world," he said, "in which we need to share responsibility. It's easy to say, 'It's not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.' Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes."

Fred Rogers was not a weak, indecisive man. No, he was a true leader who led by example, by compassion, by seeing the worth of each and every person. I think of men like him when I read Matthew 5:5, especially in how Eugene H. Peterson translated this verse as, "You're blessed when you're content with just who you are - no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought."

Meekness is drawing one's strength not from bullying others or bragging about one's own accomplishments or from what one has attained and owns. It's not boastful or flexing one's muscles. The strength one has in meekness is realizing that one does not need to do any of those things to be noticed because they aren't seeking to be noticed. They are simply living their lives in a manner that exhorts and encourages, lifts up instead of tearing down, reaches out in mercy and compassion instead of always trying to angle for what they can get out of a situation or relationship. They realize that the best way to approach interactions with others is not as transactional but as transformational.

This is why I try to model meekness for my sons. I want them to grow up and become the kind of men who aren't cocky and arrogant, who don't need to put others down but to treat everyone with dignity and respect. I attempt to live my life in a way that is not pushy, self-serving and filled with self-assertion. I don't want them to believe in the survival of the fittest, that the strong should devour the weak, but, instead, that the they should identify themselves with the weak and to work for the equality and justice of all who are oppressed or discriminated against.

I teach my sons that no matter how smart they are, there is always someone who is smarter (and to learn from them) and those who are not (and to help teach them). Whatever talents they have, they are to be used, not to make a name for oneself, but to humbly use whatever gifts they have to establish community and the best in others.

Meekness is stepping outside of self to serving. When I look up meekness, the first image that appears is of Christ washing the feet of his disciples. Meekness is setting aside one's pride to humble oneself to serve. It is not thinking too highly or too lowly of oneself, because one isn't thinking of oneself. One is focused on others.

Men like my Papa Fred and Fred Rogers lived this out in their daily lives. When others saw their humility, they did not mock or deride their characters, but spoke highly and admired them for their peaceful natures, their givingness, their tender-hearted and kind natures. These were not men who were seen as weak but as self-less helpers. They both treated all as their neighbors.

Fred Rogers said, "When I say it's you I like, I'm talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than anything you can ever see or hear or touch. That deep part of you that allows you to stand for those things without which humankind cannot survive. Love that conquers hate, peace that rises triumphant over war, and justice that proves more powerful than greed."

I strive to model meekness because the world needs more people who understand the strength that comes with humility and integrity, mercy and compassion, kindness and generosity. If we view meekness that way, why wouldn't we want the meek to inherit the earth? It would be a better world for it.

1 comment:

  1. Surprisingly enough, I thought one person who showed himself to be a meek person this week was James Comey. I knew very little about him, other than the fact of his firing and how his investigations into H Clinton seem to have disadvantaged her in a possibly unfair way). But he impressed me as a very honest and humble person when he gave his testimony this week; he could have spun the story in a way that made him look better and more powerful, but he was very authentic: "Maybe if I'd been a stronger person..." I think that kind of meekness might make one lose face in the eyes of society, but I would imagine it has benefits on the inside -- that you can live with yourself for being honest and not compromising.

    I appreciate this post and am enjoying your series. I am pondering "Blessed are those who mourn" this month but am not yet sure what/if I will blog about it.

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